July 21, 1968

 My father founded the parish in Elgin. We lived in the parsonage, flanked by a huge asparagus field, within easy walking distance of the church. My sister Joyce was born there.

Janet and I, as the sanctuary went up behind us.
Janet and I, as the sanctuary went up behind us.
Standing in front of the Elgin parsonage. I'm distraught because they keep replacing me with other children.
Standing in front of the Elgin parsonage. I’m distraught because they keep replacing me with other children.

Sometimes, my father tape recorded our dinner conversations, to mine them for potential sermon illustrations. Some of those reel-to-reel tapes survived half a century. On one, I insist I want a dog because the boy next door, PF, has a dog. My dad asks me what color of dog I want. “Blue” I reply because I’m 4 years old. Janet requested a pink dog, but she was only two.

They're tired of me and test-driving a newer model named Janet = WAAAA!
They’re tired of me and test-driving a newer model named Janet = WAAAA!
One person in this portrait is in utter despair.
One person in this portrait is in utter despair.

On the tapes, Janet, my dad, and I erupt in applause every time my mother lays food on the table. My father wanted to show appreciation – and teach us to do the same – for even mundane tasks like food preparation. Looking back, it was more about appreciating my mother, something he showed in so many ways, it leaves me breathless. Suffice to say, although I believe my husband and children love me, I’ve never received a standing ovation for dinner.

Geneva and Vance, young and in love.
Geneva and Vance, young and in love.
They're far younger than we are now.
They’re far younger than we are now.

Children of parents deeply in love all their lives are lucky indeed. My parents  treated each other with respect and kindness, no matter the circumstances. Their love wasn’t wild and dramatic, like what I saw in the movies. It was deeper and more profound. It was real. It went the distance. My sisters and I were blessed enough to bear witness.

Look how happy we were before they brought home a spare!
Look how happy we were before they brought home a spare!
Such a happy family of three!
Such a happy family of three!

Many people mistakenly believe they had the best dad or mom in the world.  I’m one of three girls who did. My father was tall, dark, and handsome, charismatic, kind, and wise. My mother was gentle and beautiful, understanding, and insightful. They found each other and held on for 66 years of marriage. I’m sad but not surprised my mother died within a year of my father. They belong together, forever.

From the beginning - King and Queen of their high school prom
From the beginning – King and Queen of their high school prom
Years later
Years later