It’s weird to read an entry like this when photographs of the same day tell a different story. Several explanations spring to mind.
- I’m a born curmudgeon and complainer.
- I suffered a hormonal imbalance.
- It takes me a while to acclimate to new places.
- I lost at bridge, which always puts me in a terrible mood.
- No matter where I find myself, I want to be somewhere else.
- All of the above.
In 1989, the answer was “all of the above.” In the ensuing decades, I’d like to think I’ve matured to the extent that I no longer yearn to be someplace else. On the contrary, I’m grateful to be exactly where I am right now.
Why did it take me so long to realize the benefits of living here and now, something most people don’t need to “learn” at all? I believe I was born this way. If you know anything about the enneagram, I identify as a #4 – people prone to melancholy nostalgia over a lost, idealized past. Not exactly the life of any party (that might be a #7).
You can’t get over being a #4 (or any other number) – we are all who we are. That doesn’t mean we can’t be a better version of ourselves.
In this case, believe the pictures – not my words.